self-transformation.

The foremost method to break the cycle of negative energy exchanges with another person is one of self-transformation. 

The most basic level of self-transformation is that I don’t react verbally to the other person with words. But, I mention the negative energy received from the other, in the physical forms of negative expressions, vision, words and actions, to others and create an atmosphere of negativity and also give birth to negative perceptions of the person in others’ minds. In such cases, damage occurs on a physical level and damage control has to be done later, which sometimes is too late to do, since relationships have already been harmed.

The second and little deeper level of self-transformation is where I not only don’t react but I don’t talk against the person to anyone, even to people who are close to me, but I continue to think negatively about the other person. In such cases, damage is reduced but still happens, unknowingly and invisibly, behind the curtains of physical eyes and ears, as my thoughts and emotions are not completely under my control and they are led to a direction, which is incorrect as per the basics of spiritual wisdom – sometimes willingly and sometimes I do not want them to be led there but they go in that direction unwillingly due to a lack of inner strength. These negative thoughts and emotions do reach the other person on a subtle level, harming relations with that person.

The third and deepest level of self-transformation is where I develop the power to change the quality of my thoughts and feelings as well. I am emotionally empowered enough to remove the flaw (weakness) in my own character that was at the root of my reactions, so that what used to pinch me so much will not do so anymore. Also, relationships get protected by doing that, which is something each one of us desires.  This is the power of accommodation and self-transformation in action, at its best and possesses the potential to stop negative energy exchanges with the other.

In nutshell , for improving relationships we have to change thoughts about that person also, only words & action will not serve you anymore. Your thoughts, words & actions should be in harmony to improve the relationship.